Wednesday 7 December 2011

Christmas tunes (for the UK economy)

Lawyers generally have a bad reputation for being mean, conniving and downright slippery; as a profession they’re hated the world over. 

Still, it seems they’re not a patch on economists.  Well, one in particular.

mervyn christmasYou can find the full list of ‘songs’ here – think of this as just a festive taster! 
(Shame there’s nothing on YouTube for Save Our Savers… yet).

Mervyn King Is Coming To Town
(to tune of “Santa Claus is Coming To Town”) [I didn’t see that coming!]

You better be brave
You better not cry
You better not save
I'm telling you why
Mervyn King is coming to town

He's making a list
Checking a lot
He’s gonna find out who's saving or not
Mervyn King is coming to town


We Wish You a Merry Christmas

We wish you a Merry Christmas
We wish you a Merry Christmas
We wish you a Merry Christmas, can we have one too?
Poor savings we have, thanks to your MPC
We wish you a Merry Christmas, can we have one too?

Oh rid us of high inflation
Oh rid us of high inflation
Oh rid us of high inflation and do it right now


Interest rates
(to tune of “Jingle Bells”) [Fancy that?]

Dashing to the bank
In a chauffeured limousine
Goes Sir Mervyn King
Earning cash obscene
Mulled wine with the Court
Keeping spirits bright
Oh what fun it is to sing
A banker’s song tonight

Interest rates, interest rates
Lower them all the way
Oh what fun it is to squeeze
Savers every day
Interest rates, interest rates
Lower them all the way
Oh what fun it is to squeeze
Savers every day


Ding Dong Merrily on High

Ding dong merrily on high
Sir Mervyn’s plan’s not working
Ding dong! Verily we cry
It’s savers that he’s hurting
Gloria, It’s savers that he’s hurting


Mervyn, The Red-Nosed Banker
(to tune of “Rudolf, the Red-Nosed Reindeer”) [you don’t say…]

Mervyn, the red-nosed banker
Had a very nasty cold
Said he could cut inflation
Wish that we had all bought gold

All of the nation’s savers
Used to cry and call him names
They never let poor Mervyn
Join in any savers’ games

Then one foggy Christmas Eve
Santa came to say
“Mervyn with your nose so bright
Won’t you raise your rates tonight?”


The Twelve Days of Christmas

On the twelfth day of Christmas
Sir Mervyn gave to me:
Twelve months of waffle
Eleven annuities sinking
Ten growth adjustments
Nine MPC doves
Eight banks not lending
Seven economists spouting
Six pounds a-falling
Five per cent inflation
Four broken pensions
Three years of nothing
Two bouts of QE
And no interest on my savings

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